In January, I started applying for an enormous fellowship, called the Watson, that only a handful of colleges and universities in the US are eligible to nominate students to apply for.

It was going fantastically well - it transformed the extremely negative energy I was harboring from obsessing over a dumb boy into a beautiful, tangible, clear outlet. The creative energy, which, really, was quite creative - was able to actually do me some good again in the context of finding my passions and deepest interests.